Marriage is a union of two souls and with that union comes the most detested topic - union of finances.

How to handle finances after marriage becomes quite a dispute between the spouses. It's not rare to see spouses arguing, debating, fighting and even divorcing because of some disagreement over this matter.

Personal finance is a very delicate & sensitive matter in marriage. In today's world when both husband and wife are working each expect to have his/her own identity and nobody wants to be told that he/she can't spend money on this or that item. Telling your spouse about his/her expenses will make him/her feel hurt and he/she might become defensive and things can start getting onto the wrong path.

What is the best way to handle money matter after marriage so that the marital bliss doesn't get affected? Well, let's face the truth - there is no best way to handle it. Why? Let's dissect each option:

1. Separate bank account - There are many advocates out there that say having separate bank accounts will make things easy. Clearly define the share of expenses one has to do and let each be responsible for the monthly bills and expenses. Well great. But what if the person doesn't foresee bills and overspends? You can't blame the person that the electricity got cut because of "YOU". It will only lead to disaster. Moreover the question of TRUST might arise as not sharing bank accounts and finances do create some distance and can cause some trust related issues. You don't want your spouse to feel that you don't trust him/her.


2. Joint bank account - Well consider having joint account that spouses can share. Money from both the parties come to the same account and then all expenses go from there. Great! seems like all the problem is over.

But wait. Do you want that someday your spouse takes all your money and run away? Yes it happens!

Do you want your spouse to know how much you are spending on his/her gift?

Do you want to feel pressurized that someone is watching your expenses and you can't live your life as free as you could have if you had your bank account separate from that of your spouse?

Don't you want to be that free bird who could enjoy her life before marriage at her own will?

Don't you want to be that guy who could spend a little extra on his next night out?

It seems Joint bank account has it's own positive and negative points.

So how to deal with it?

• First of all trust your partner. Nothing will work out without this basic trust.
• Maintain your separate bank account to give each spouse peace of mind that the other can't take away the money from his/her account just in case matter gets worse.
• Create a joint account that gets funded by separate individual accounts and use that joint account to pay monthly bills. You can decide on how much percentage of take home income each will deposit in the joint account.
• Work together to have emergency savings that can last 3 to 6 months of your expenses. It's VERY IMPORTANT.
• After marriage work towards common goals and become rich together. Life is futile without a worthy partner beside you to enjoy and grow old with.
• Try not to tap onto each other's savings that existed before marriage. Ask your spouse if that's meant for some special occasion. You might never know that your spouse was saving money before marriage to take his/her partner onto a grand anniversary after 5-10 years of marriage. Feel proud of your spouse's saving habits

What do you think that will work towards a healthy personal finance after marriage? Your thought/comments are welcome.